03132021 22:34:00 IDKH

I can’t stop listening to Dallon sing. It’s like a medicine I didn’t know I needed. I can’t sleep tonight and he takes me into a scary world that I don’t want to fall into. I try so hard to only listen to happy music but he draws me back into a space that forces me to reflect. I also like how the music videos seem connected to each other telling a strange nightmare. …

I hope I don’t have a nightmare tonight. I can’t sleep because I have indigestion from too much fish & chips. I couldn’t finish the rest of my zucchini, but I also couldn’t stop from stuffing myself with the rest of the fries! It was so good, I couldn’t even taste the food from scarfing it down. It was my first real meal today. For breakfast I drank flax seed and golden milk. I watched a video about putting flax seed gel on my head, but that was a terrible idea! I have been losing so much hair, I’m starting to look very scary. But now I can’t stop craving that gooey flax seed drink.

So far, this has been the toughest month of the year. There is so much to do all at once that I feel this is my new theme song. If only I had a voice like Dallon. I don’t know how he sings in that style, but I love it and I can’t get enough of this funky beat. I remember the first time they were played at Emo Night Day, I was completely captivated. I thought they were the host, but it was just their music video playing LOL. I can’t wait to get out of quarantine so that I can go see them perform. I guess concerts are where I find true bliss. Watching them on stage through YouTube makes me wish I could find some band mates and rock out on a stage. I don’t really want to tour at this age, but it would have been nice if I had done so over a decade ago. But my biggest concern right now is how to get that “big shot” to leave me alone…

I know that in the end, it doesn’t really matter. I won’t even remember these “ big shots” in the future and I need to practice being more calm so that they don’t disrupt my zen.

Anyway, I won’t be getting much sleep this month because I suddenly have a bunch of exams to study for. Is it even worth it? We are in a pandemic! It’s hard to focus on anything other than Razzzmataz…🎶🎵

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