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10202020 11:11:00

This is the first time I felt carsick from my own driving. I started taking 1000mg gummy apple cider vinegar this weekend. It surprisingly tastes OK for a gummy that reminds me of stinky feet. I’ve noticed I’ve lost my appetite for everything else. I no longer want a Choco-pie and Chick Fil Le sandwiches taste awfully salty. I don’t even want soup and I cannot stand salad. So I’m not sure what to eat nowadays. What used to be the highlight of my day has turned into painfully long minutes of “OMG what should I eat so that I don’t pass out…” You might be thinking, why don’t I just put random food in my mouth. Imagine stuffing paper tissue in your mouth, it’s just bland and weird–something you just don’t wanna do.

I’ve been trying to fix my adrenals and sleeping at 8PM, but I find myself awake at 3AM and 5AM! I think I’ll start on the prescribed antibiotics tonight since nothing else is really effective enough. I need to be OK for my math exam next week or else I will fail it like my sexual harassment exam yesterday LOL. I was so tired I could hardly read the questions and I was constantly interrupted. I think since I was the first one to take it, I changed the passing percentage to 75% instead of 84%. The questions were surprisingly much shorter and easier the second round, but I still struggled with them. It’s interesting because the dream I had that morning was of me failing the MATH Exam even though it was very short and simple word problems with multiple choice answers! I am dreading it so much, but I should study right now. I think the brain works like your muscles. It turns into mush when you are tired and there is no point in studying. It’s better if you just sleep, but that’s no excuse for procrastination. 

My dream last night was very fun. I met my love! (No idea who he is in real life, but in my dream, I recognized him as my luv.) We were playing basketball in a cool gymnasium by the ocean. He was extremely talented and great at dunking–something I cannot do. There were times when he was showing off and his face would turn into a demon, but I was not afraid of him–and he didn’t try to kill me. I remember laughing and smiling a lot and the feeling of having lots of fun. The scene changed, I was speeding on a highway. Then I drove us off a short cliff and we landed in a parking lot in front of the beach. We were about to do yoga and watch the waves crashing on the shore, but it was not quite as peaceful as he had planned. There was a busy road in front of us and the cars would drive right toward us, but immediately turn before they hit us. It was thrilling and strange, yet we enjoyed it. Then my alarm woke me up. I hate when my alarm interrupts my dreams. But I’m excited to meet this mysterious, fun, tall and talented man in real life. = ^ . ^ = It could be days, weeks, or a couple months, but I feel like it will be very soon. 

This is getting long, but I found a new contest to enter. The theme is food, so it is perfect for the drawing I made for “my kin” project of ChickenPotPie!!! She is sometimes sweet and salty; on the surface, kind of bland. You never know what you’re gonna get on the inside. We are not talking because I cut out toxic relationships recently so that I can work on healing. I   do   not   like   anyone   who does   not   let me sleep, so sadly, she had to go. But occasionally I miss her and her little ones who are probably taller than me by now. You can check out more entries here.


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